Shut Down Heckler & Koch By Entombing The Factory In Concrete

Haters gonna hate, and apparently plot terrorism:

Not sure if THAT incredibly stupid.. or just trolling.  ShutDownH&K is seeking crowd funding on indiegogo to fly helicopters over the factory of HK and drop a sand cement mixture over it to seal it up.  Maybe the definition of terrorism is different in Germany, but that sounds like a clear cut threat to me.  I’m sure we will see the indiogogo campaign go *poof* any day now.

All else aside, I don’t think they really thought through the logistics.  Can you imagine how much cement it would take to cover a factory?  The quantity of cement a helicopter could carry?  That would be 10s of thousands of helicopter trips.  My guess is if this actually did end up going down, they would be on helicopter trip #2 and an employee would walk out of the HK factory with one of their snazzy 40mm grenade launchers, line the helicopter up in the sights, pull the trigger, helicopter goes down in flames, employee dusts his hands off and clocks out for lunch.

You might remember ShutDownH&K from their witty “Not In Nottingham” H&K x Robin Hood spoof.  Maybe ShutDownH&K is just bitter because H&K thinks they suck and they hate them.


Note to self: In the future pronounce Sarcophagus as Sa-ga-fag-us.

Hat tip: Olly


49 responses to “Shut Down Heckler & Koch By Entombing The Factory In Concrete”

  1. well, they would need to buy their own helicopters and train their own pilots. But none of it makes sense, you just going to do this and hope no one notices while it happens? You would need every helicopter in existence as i doubt anyone would get a second trip in.
    I hope that voice is computer generated as it is the most annoying i have ever heard.

  2. i literally laughed.

    1. OH NOES OUR FACTORY IS ENCASED IN CONCRETE……we can blow ourselves out with guns, or build a new factory.

    2. im sure the german government (who probably uses guns made by HK) would certainly approve flight plans for “dumping concrete on a production facility)

    3. the G3 is 21st century technology? so THATS why we shouldnt be allowed the MP7, ITS 31ST CENTURY TECHNOLOGY YALL!!!


    H&K investing big money in shovels.

    1. shovels they won’t sell to the general public, the assholes.

  4. Please just be a troll. Please just be a troll. I’ve already lost enough hope for humanity. I don’t want to lose the rest.

  5. The max sling load of a Chinook is 26000lbs. That means it could carry approximately 500 cubic feet per trip. That’s just shy of 2 full cement trucks… A random search for operating costs puts the CH-47 at around $1800 per hour for the newer models. I’m not sure how accurate that is. I’m a helicopter pilot, but I don’t fly any big iron….er, aluminum.

    Either way, no way in h*** some hippies could pull that one off.

  6. Michaelbak Avatar

    Da fu?

    Also isn’t this you know… Terrorism? Minding the fact that their idea is ridiculous and makes no sense.

    I’m surprised they didn’t propose building giant catapults to fling giant globs of jello into the factory’s air vents. With jello in their machines those evil H&K Henchmen are sure to have trouble running them! Furthermore why not release a bunch of Mice into the plant to chew on all their computers wiring and power lines. That’ll hit ’em hard.

  7. Or just drop ONE MASSIVE CRUCIFIX on the plant, and bring your inflatable mobile church to put it in front of the CEO office, and all those evil motherf*ckers will burst into flames. Only one flight needed…

    Crazy plan, I’d really love it to be true, and to see how much they’ll raise. Why do these morons don’t try to do something useful out of their time? Or at least target something significant, an AK factory for example… If you do something stupid, at least do it seriously.

  8. Can we send the helicopters to the HiPoint factory so I never have to hear how awesome HiPoints are ever again?

    1. concrete vs hipoint = hipoint wins

  9. Their indiegogo is only asking for $4,300 USD. I’m not sure they could even make a phone call with that. I think it’s a “get $4000 quick scheme”.

  10. Does HK make AA guns?

  11. Did she say they want to prevent harmful products from “ecscaping”? I’d like to “axe” her about that.

    That’s a pretty neat animation for a group that’s obviously fully retarded to come up with a ridiculous plane like that.

  12. How long did it take the USSR to build the sarcophagus for the Chernobyl plant? This is really dumb idea. Looks like some people are getting some free money!

  13. what is this i dont even….just no. No.

  14. The end result of you trying to cover a facility like this in cement would likely be the facility’s security team coming out and turning you into burning wreckage and red paste.

    And if you’re stupid enough to donate to this, well…I have some bad news.

    1. Oh yeah that and gun manufacturing is a legitimate business practice and guns aren’t evil, therefore this group’s very existence (and their diction) is completely invalid.

  15. I seriously don’t think they understand what cement is or how it works. What. No.

    1. without forms, wouldn’t it just run and slough off into a puddle around the factory?

  16. Got to keep those guns from “escaping” somehow. Surely this is some crazy new viral marketing campaign from HK? If not, and this group of (presumably German) people actually think this could work logistically, I no longer believe that the United States has a worse education system than any of the Europeans.

  17. This is about the funniest thing I’ve seen all year.

    Anyone else notice how they somehow got an AR collapsible stock on their pic of the G36?

    1. Rockravn Avatar

      I lol’d so hard when I saw the collapsible stock on the G36!

  18. Some translation of the German updates:
    This “performance” isn’t about the weapons per se, but about doubious exports by HK, so that HK-weapons turn up in unstable regions and regimes world-wide (except the G3, they were exported years ago, also several countries have production licenses)
    It seems they got an art grant or something that will match money they get through the funding, so in the end they’ll have ~$8000.
    One of the updates said that they’ll have to pay 2000€ per helicopter, so if they reach their goal they’ll have 4 helicopters.
    Also, it seems that HK informed the local police who are investigating the art group.

    1. so lets say they get 4 helicopters, assume they are chinooks, 4×500 = 2000 cubic feet. Going from google maps, if you somehow get a magical uniform spread of about 1 inch depth you might just cover everything. If no one notices what you did until the cement cures you will at least have made the janitors next few days a pain in the ass.

  19. The new concrete encased factory would make a helluva “Castle Destro.”

  20. This is how they penned in Chernobyl: By pouring cement on it from helicopters.

    Do these maroons think that the HK factory is radioactive? That the guns they make there can’t be touched without protective gear?

    That’s taking hoplophobia to new levels.

  21. i really want them to do it, because i love seeing hippies fail.

  22. hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! This is halarious!!!

  23. Hard_Harry Avatar

    I’m curious as to where they got the numbers of casualties caused by HK weapons.

    1. Considering it doesn’t give any citation, I’d say it was the same place everybody else gets uncited numbers: their own imagination.

  24. For real this shit..

    First of all, it’s destruction of private property on a very very large scale.
    Second; what company that offers airlift services is going to do this?

    And finally, ain’t there like thousands of other factories?

    People seriously need to figure out what they want to do with their lives..

  25. I reported the indiegogo page, as I’m sure many others did. It was taken down! Hooray!

  26. Bill Copeland Avatar
    Bill Copeland

    Have you considered the wisdom of attacking a factory with helicopters when that factory builds weapons used to shoot down helicopters? The HK factory is not the only place that HK weapons are made; there are several factories here is the USA that make copies of HK G3 rifles along with factories in Greece and Argentina. Maybe you should reconsider your plan which even if successful would merely make that factory bomb proof and not halt the production of weapons.

  27. EnfieldEM2 Avatar

    Bwa ha ha ha ha ha! Hilarious, although since indieagogo shut down funding on the printable gun project would they sanction this? I think so.

  28. EnfieldEM2 Avatar

    Bwa ha ha ha ha ha!

  29. EnfieldEM2 Avatar

    Malfunction, please delete my first comment.

  30. yay! we destroyed H&K! the world is finally at peace now!

  31. I had to go look, people are actually giving money to this! Just proves that there are stupid people everywhere.

    1. Or FN, Colt, and Sig Sauer realized this could be a real market opportunity for them.

  32. Eh, let the HK factory stop working. Maybe they will get the elitist stick out of their asses and start selling some real guns in the US.

    1. Interesting take. I have 9 HK’s and consider them among the finest tools that I own.

      Or perhaps you’re yet another internet parrot that has never owned an HK? Polly want a cracker?

      In my decades-long experience, HK neither hates me or thinks I suck. But don’t let my actual first-hand experience ruin your childish, uninformed, internet meme.

      Feel free to get in another hour of skateboarding or gaming in before your mama tucks you in for the night. Hot chocolate, graham crackers, and mamas sweet caress. Nighty night troll.

  33. Dracon1201 Avatar

    Wow, I think if this went through, Germany would definitely sanction the use of live fire at the H&K plant, if not for industry, then for the nearby houses on that map!

  34. Why do we even care? H&K’s are not for civilians anyway.

  35. i literally laughed when they said HK is the killing machine. yeah ok. those guns just went and killed all those people. there wasnt even anybody pulling the trigger

  36. I have a better idea, how about every gun-hating, fuck-nut, lib-tard, Hippie just load up in the helicopters and jump without a parachute onto the HK factory roof? That’ll show em! It could be the new 21st century protest!

  37. They want to encase the HK factory in… What?! Why the fuck? I don’t even…

  38. Is it hippies that are allergic to brain cells?
    Or is it brain cells that are allergic to hippies?
    Oh, well. This hysterically retarded scheme will fail just as soon as the hippies realize that there might be some WORK involved….


  39. Sack-o-fag-us…. I love it.
    I think I’m gonna go donate 5 bucks in the hope that they’ll either try something or at least get more publicity. No one will ever trust liberal anti-gun nuts again.

    1. shit, I just noticed her terrible english. too damn funny